full-time ministry?!?

We had our mid-summer intern assessments yesterday, because we are halfway through our trip!  (THIS IS CRAZY!  I truly get depressed whenever I think about this summer ending!!)  I met with Alan, David, and Kathy for a good half hour during which we discussed my role on the trip thus far.  It was a really encouraging meeting and has caused me to reflect a lot on my future.... because, part of the reason I came on this trip was to see if I could handle full-time ministry.  I'll be a senior next year so I really need to be figuring these kinds of things out!

 

Well, I really really love ministry overall.  Here are the hardest things about it:  1.) Not always seeing results. 2.) Wondering if I'm making any difference.  3.) Not feeling like being loving.  4.) Seeing people as projects or tasks instead of... people.

 

Here are some of the best things:  1.) Seeing things happen through me that are so clearly God and not me.  2.) Seeing God answer prayers about people.  3.)  Constantly craving God and his Word because there is literally no other way I'm going to be able to do anything.  4.)  Getting to brainstorm and pray and come up with exciting ideas!  5.)  Getting the privilege to love people as a job!

 

I thought it would be hard to not have a routine, but I really don't mind it.  (We do have team bible study every morning at 9 though, and that has been so helpful.)  I can be all over the place as long as some of it is planned beforehand.  AND as long as I get some time to myself every day.  SO important.  Having a day off (yay Mondays!) is incredibly crucial as well.

 

This is a long post, but basically I am starting to seriously think that full-time ministry might be something I could do.  Alan, David, and Kathy definitely encouraged me with this... which is great because they have seen so much of me the past month!  And it's not always pretty, of course.  Alan kept joking about me coming back after I graduate to help with the youth.  I think he was just being nice/funny, but part of me hopes he isn't!  So maybe I could come back to Dublin or I could pursue the RUF internship or I could look for a youth position at a church in the States somewhere..... just some possibilities!  I am really so excited that I could maybe do this with my life!  It would truly be such a huge privilege.